Demam yg amat!

tak dpt nk teruskan entry day by day...
ni pon dh 2 hari xsentuh laptop....
fb pon x sentuh
demam yg maha hebat...

sedih gila rase sebab terpaksa susahkan mak n hubs
nurin pon dh 2 mlm tdo ngan mak
mlm ni pon...

skrg dh rase sihat sikit...
tp masih jejak 38degrees...

hopefully by esok sembuh betol2...
sbb dh janji nk bwk nurin tdo umah atok n tok mama dia....

jiayou fana!!!!
kuatkan semangat!!!!


p/s: dlm pd i tgh kesakitan, they made a decision without asking me, her mother....they just blindly listened to what others said....luluh rasa hati ni tiap kali nurin disumbat dgn 'benda' tu..... :(

Day 1 - Day 3

Day 1

• since I delivered in Govt Hospital, opkos la ade visiting hours kan. so bile non-visiting hour, I tried to catch some sleep. tp x boleh...coz hati ni dok nk ngulit and perhati si kecil
• masih dlm mode tak percaya dh jadi seorang ibu, and berjaya endure the labour pain and process. normal delivery lak tu. dok terkenang2 saat2 nk melahirkan tu....Subhanallah...
• rasa sakit jahitan buat i jadi malas. malas nk minum, malas nk makan. tp hubs, mama, mak, ayah and akak dok paksa2 masa i baru je masuk wad. tp i buat dek. bile sampai visiting hour tghari, mama ayah n akak dtg lagi, again, dipaksa makan....makan la jugak sesuap dua sudu nasi hospital (keras!) ngan lauk fishball sup (sedap) and ikan sweet sour (x lalu nk telan)....
• sister dtg ajar i serba sikit utk breastfeed baby...tp masih tak berapa nk berjaya, cos baby dok nk tido je...dia hisap kejap je.. itupon dia tak dpt nk latch dgn betol coz my nipple yg hujung tu, tak terkeluar sgt....bentuk kon je....hok hok
• berjaya pee sendiri dlm masa 4 jam after delivery. walau rasa horror gile, dan ditemani akak (smpai dlm toilet) i kuatkan semangat. sbb dh set dlm kepala nk discharge ptg ni jugak. xmo susahkan hubs ulang alik spital....akak jugak laaa yg dok tolong i salin baju, salin pad and wutsoever. malu? dh tak tau ape itu malu sejak asik kene seluk...hohoho....nasib la akak ade masa tu.....tq kak sbb sanggup amik cuti! loff u!!!!
• bile nurse tanye baby dh kencing n berak, I gelabah..dh la masa tu takde sape teman, plus i tgh ngantok gile....so cam mamai...nurse dok paksa I cek sendiri baby nye diaper.the thing is, i dunno how!!!! dh la baby pakai bedung, kang I bukak, camne pulak nk pakai balik. plus i takde bwk bekal any wet tissue...duh! last2 mintak sikit dr akak katil opposite. dia jugak yg ajar camne nk cuci, tukar diaper and  bedung baby. fuhhhh!!!! berjaya jugak, walau dok terkepit2...huhuhu
• rasa mcm nk maki je nurse, bila i tgh dok nk tido, tetibe dia kejut (dgn kasarnye) suruh i bangun n gi satu bilik ni sbb doc nk cek jahitan and again, kene seluk utk cek ntah ape before boleh discharge.
• slepas  kene cek, tetibe doc kata, i tak boleh discharge ptg tu, becos our baby's GM level was quite low....(note: baby yg bawah 2.5kg mmg akan dimonitor GM level, katanya)
• i balik ke katil, n since tak boleh balik, i decide utk mandi. ade air panas! best!!! rase segar bile dh mandi tu....
• tetibe dtg sorg nurse, tanye i, since i tak discharge, i nak tukar bilik tak. sbb 2nd class ward yg i duduk tu, aircond nye rosak. hampeh gile!!! so dia offer dok 3rd class yg setiap katil ade 1 kipas. i ckp, i don't mind...sbb yg ltak i kt 2nd class tu pon is my uncle, Dr Ghaz (Uncle Li)....sepatutnye dpt yg first class yg bilik 1 katil tu, tp ntah nape, ade sister tu x bg! nurse dh tolak masuk dh, ttbe dia tarik balik...tak tau la nape....
• n tetibe jugak, nurse tu dtg semula kt i, kata i boleh balik...yahooo!!!! rupenye GM level my baby dh naik...bape readingnye, idokle teman tau....dh boleh balik tu pon dh cukup syukur dah....
• discharge process agak lambat. yela...bk documents kene setel...gitu gini, 7.20 baru setel..dh  laaa tgh maghrib, nk bawak baby keluar...tawakal je la
• sepanjang perjalanan balik, ujan renyai....ujan rahmat utk baby kata mak...Alhamdulillah, sampai rumah, hujan reda.....

Night 1

• had nasi putih, air asam and ikan cencaru bakar for dinner...masih xde selera nk mkn...tp telan je sbb kesiam  mak dh sediakan.....
• baby nangis, i dok suakan my breast. 3 of us (hubs, mak n me) dok pikir baby lapar...but she refused! dia cam dok paling2 muka...mak dh baca ayat2 pape yg patut. cos igt ade 'something' yg tak kena or kacau dia masa balik td...sekali i teringat nk cek diaper dia....duh!!! dh naik kering dh stool dia...patutla dia meragam....
• after salin diaper, she slept. weols pon setel la pape yg patut semua..tetibe, dia nangis..lapar la tu kan....i sua kan my breast...sumpah i semangat gile nk breastfeed kn my baby.....tp hampa gile sbb though my nipple is already in her mouth, dia taknak latch...dia dok melalak jeeee... i try urut mrs b...dgn harapan dptlaaa menghasilkan hasil...unfortunately, takde...nothing came out...they were very soft too...mak dok kata, dia dulu, dh keras dh...air dh memancut la ape laa...i ape lg, depressed la....rasa cam loser and such a failure....hubs teringat psl my breastpump. dia suruh i pump. i did. unfortunately, mmg takde pape yg keluar...and mrs b i lak rase sakit gile sbb mcm dipaksa2 kan...hubs dh mula nk marah...siap hentak my breastpump kata BP tu tak guna.. sedih hati i....again, bertambah depressed....hasilnye, the whole night 3 of us x dpt nk tido coz bb dok melalak on and off...dh la mmg takde backup FM...mmg i tak terpikir nk beli sbb mmg dh set dlm kepala nk fully bf kan...mana sangka, mrs b tak dpt beri kerjasam sepenuhnya....last2, mak and hubs insist on bg air zamzam...i redha je la....nk buat cmne kan....dr terus tgk bb exhausted melalak, mak suapkan air zamzam pakai sudu sikit2...Alhamdulillah, reda sikit tangisan dia...
• oh yea...kakak and ayah came over to visit us....baru pg tu jumpe kt hospital, atok dh rindu kt nurin...tp masa they came over, nurin belom meragam lagi....ok ok je lagi..huhuhu

Day 2

• start berurut. bibik yg urutkan..mak mmg rajin panggil dia utk urut or kemas umah....oh i loved being diurut..bibik ni urut sedap gileee...ade la sikit2 part yg sakit...tp mostly i rase best jeee....kan ade org yg jenis urut bersungguh...mana yg u sakit, lg ditekan2 ke ape kan..tp ni tak...mmg sedap....after urut satu badan, dia sengkak perut..ni takdela sakit mana, tp tak selesa sikit la...tp ok je.....then berparam satu badan, pakaikan bengkung lilit yg panjang gile tu and berpilis..... fuh...param tu mmg hangat!! rasa warm je badan ni
• pokteh n mokteh dtg....pokteh yg temankan hubs gi kedai beli FM...they bought Enfalac A+....Alhamdulillah....our baby dpt terima susu tu...luluh hati ni tiap kali bancuh susu tu....tp nak buat mcm mana kan...takdir mengatasi segalanya. jgn kata i tak berusaha! i did...even sblm anyone sumbat FM ke my baby, i insist to hold my baby, and paksa dia hisap jugak mrs b...dgn harapan dpt stimulate la kan...tp mmg takde hasil....takpelah. dlm kepala i pikir positif...esok2 adela rezeki anak i....cuma i kene kuatkan semangat....
• for lunch, I had nasi putih + singgang ikan ape ntah yg fresh dr laut courtesy pokteh + sup sawi

Night 2

• dinner pulak nasi putih + cencaru bakar + sup sawi
• Fikri (hub's friend) and wife, Jane together with their adorable son, Rayyan came to visit...byk tips yg diorang share....infact masa tgh pregnant and air ketuban pecah pon tanye diorg....hiks! diorg dtg siap hadiahkan bag lagi...comel beg tu! ;)
• Nurin berjaya tidur dgn nyenyak unlike the night before. she woke up only once at 3.30am for milk and diaper change right after...tp dh pagi tu rase bersalah pulak sbb tak kejutkan dia every 2 hours for milk...sbb baby kan patut byk menyusu kan.....tp juga rasa gembira and bangga sbb berjaya went through the night with nurin alone, tanpa ganggu tidur mak or hubs...;)

Day 3

• pagi tu, urut lagi.....same routine..and kesedapan masih same....hikhik.....mcm nk mintak urut 44 hari je terus...hahaha...melampau!
• ptg tu, tetibe nurse from KK called, said they'd like to come over to visit mom n baby
• dlm kol 3, diorg sampai....3 of them...they checked me first. since i dh kencing before they came, x dpt la nk check urine. move on to check my BP, mata, leher, breast and kaki for oedema....entah ek...sejak bersalin, kaki i masih bengkak lg....takde la segemuk masa end of pregnancy...tp bengkak la jugak....
• after dh check mommy, check baby lak...they checked her physical and reflex response, alhamdulillah, all good...unfortunately, they claimed my baby mcm ade jaundice (kuning) and adviced us to go to KK for further check up the very next day. hati adelah sgt risau..... :(
• masih mencuba utk breastfeed, tp tak berjaya..pump pon tarak hasil....Nurin on FM the whole day

Night 3

• kawan mak dtg...tp x kenal siapa....
• Nurin managed to sleep well....infact, she slept too well...mmg baby yg ade jaundice, akan asik tidur jeeee....I yg risau sbb dia tak bangun utk susu..jaundice bb kene selalu diberi susu, kalau boleh 2 jam sekali...so that dia byk poo and pee, maka kuningnye pon akan kurang...therefore, i tried to kejutkan dia....i usik2 pipi dia, cuit sana sini, tak jln...dia just kerut2, or tido jeeeeee..dekat sejam i tried...i dh risau amat...siap kejutkan hubs mintak dia kejutkan nurin...last berjaya jugak bangunkan dia....rupenye nk kejut baby, cubit tapak kaki dia....tp nurin ni, org cucuk jarum kt kaki pon dia dek je tido..... -____-

Our Bundle of Joy ~ Presenting Our Little Princess

Name : Nurin Balqis binti Mohd Afiq

D.O.B : Monday, October 3rd, 2011, 7.58am (5 Zulkaedah 1432)

P.O.B : Hospital Sultan Ismail, Johor Bahru

Weight : 2.39 kg

Height : 46 cm

Mode of Delivery : SVD (Spontaneous Vaginal Delivery)

She started to open her eyes as soon as 7 hours after birth! :)

da lame x main futsal

Untuk Nurin!

Pumping while blogging and bertungku
sgt multi-tasking!

best achievement so far : 2.5oz from right B
left B masih kurang memberi kerjasama
takpe!!!
jiayou!!!!!!!

Lobak putih....come to mama!


p/s: siapa Nurin? will update later....stay tune!

xoxo

my first VE experience

wah.....sudah kene VE!

dh berasalin ke????

mmg tak laaaaa... -____-

 

eh jap jap

what is VE, u asked?

its Vaginal Examination

pendek kata, kene seluk kt va jay jay untuk cek bukaan serviks

ade paham?

 

well, this happened last night

gini ceritanya

dh 3 hari (since tuesday yg rasa sakit tu) I perasan, baby mcm kurang gerak

usually, by 3 or 4pm, fetal movement chart tu boleh setel

tp ni nk dekat maghrib, baru dlm 5 or 6 jeee

 

plus rasa mengeras and tightening kt area abdomen tu

comes and go

I couldn't really be bothered to time it laa

sbb mmg tak regular pon

so I just assume its Braxton Hicks

 

tp bila dh 3 hari berturut, I jadi risau la jugakkan

lagi pulak bile I google up,

ade kes yg baby kurang gerak sbb tali pusat dh terbelit

so kene emergency c-sect sbb takut baby lemas

oh risau nyeeeeee

 

so I raised my concern tu hubs,

dia lagi la risau

asik la tanya, anak kite ade gerak takkk

last², we decided to go to the hospital je

 

so smlm, after maghrib, kami terus ke HSI

first time ni, agak kompius tak tau nk gi Emergency Room or Dewan Bersalin

hubs rang his friend and asked, dia kata gi Dewan Bersalin terus

so ke sana la kami

he dropped me, and parked the car

 

naik tingkat 4

went to PAC (Patient Assessment Center)

terang serba sikit my concern to the nurse,

then disuruh buka panties and lie on bed no. 3

 

as expected, a houseman yg attend I

as the nurse's said, 'kt sini, dato' mmg letak houseman je kak'

houseman pon houseman laaa

diorang pon nak blaja gak kan

tapi, tapi....saya malu laaaaaa

sbb tau² diorang ni around my age

ahhh..belasah je lah

 

so he asked me this and that

sakit mcm mane, sejak bile, so on and so forth,

checked my blood pressure - 145/93! erk?!

tp dia senyap, I pon senyap je

 

next, wat CTG, to check baby's heart rate

dekat 20 minit jugak ah terlentang gitu

boring! dh la pinggang i ni mmg sedia ade skt

so tgh² tu, I gerak² la kan

nk selesakan pinggang ni

 

tapi..tiap kali i gerak, CTG device yg kt perut i ni pon cam teralih

so kekejap kang, sayup je dgr heart beat

kang tetibe kuat pulak

saspen je diorg...huhuhuhu

 

and based on the CTG result,

semua nmpak OK shj

nothing to worry about

baby's doing just fine

takde tanda² yg pelik ke ape

 

setel tu, tetibe the doc said nk wat VE!

oh nooooo....I selalu disogok dgn org kata VE tu sakit!

siap tanya doc, perlu ke VE?

he said yes, since I've been having pains for 3 days

takut mmg dh in labour

 

mak redhaaaa

dh la doc muda...malu laaa saya!!!!

but syukur, he never made it awkward at all

 

dgn ditemani nurse,

he sat by the bed

dia selak kain pink tu,

tgk part tu kejap to make sure of where to probe,

toleh ke tepi, and......seluk!

sakit? Alhamdulillah, to me, tak sakit pon....

cuma rasa cam tak selesa je laaa

sbb dia pakai glove and ade lubricant kan

so cam licin je laaa

takdela rase pedih kene geser ke ape

 

bile dh masuk tu, dia gerak² jari sikit

nk cari bukaan kot

tak lama pon

dlm 10-15 seconds gitu

that's it

 

and the result?

masih tertutup ye kawan².... -______-

 

terus dia kata dh boleh salin baju

and tunggu kt luar

means dh boleh balik

 

while I was waiting outside

I dah siap boleh ulang alik gi toilet and jumpe my hubs

tetibe i dipanggil semula

coz nk check BP again

sbb reading awal tadi quite high

 

so baring semula kt bed 3,

nurse suruh relax jap, sbb katanya maybe td reading tinggi sbb i risau... -____-

10 minutes later, doc came,

and checked my BP

I swear he pumped that thing 3 kali ok! (dia pakai yg manual tu...sbb lebih accurate kan)

bersungguh gile mcm tak caya my BP rate

as expected, BP masih di tahap tinggi dr biasa

 

berulang kali dia tanye i ade pening tak

ade mual tak, ade sesak nafas tak

i gelak² ckp mmg takde

dlm hati dh berkata, ni kalau betol i have the symptoms, kompem kene masuk wad

tp mmg takde...I felt totally fine

cume skt² kt area perut and pinggang tu je

 

so, again, I was asked to wait outside,

while he prepared the report

10 minutes later, report siap,

gi ER, bayar 5 ringgit

dan balik...

 

Alhamdulillah

nothing to worry about

semuanya ok je

cuma dipesan,kalau sakit makin teruk or baby masih kurg gerak,

dtg semula

 

itu lah ceritanya

part of me agak kecewa sbb dh sakit² manja tp masih belum ade tanda nk bersalin

tp part of me juga relieved, sbb semuanya masih OK

at least, dh ade experience la pergi spital

so nnt kalau dh sakit betol² nk bersalin,

takdela hubs or I gelabah tak tau nk gi mana kn

sbb dh tau area tu...

 

I really hoped I will get to experience a smooth sailing labor

tp rezeki masing² kan

suke bace experience mommies lain

pastu sebak sendiri smpai menjejes air mata bile diorg minta maaf ngan their moms and husband

sumpah sayu gile bile baca part tu

I kept on reminding myself to spare some time for that moment bile my time comes nnt

pastu happy sendiri mcm diri sendiri yg dh beranak

mcm sendiri yg dh dpt anak....

 

oh tak sabar nk cium bau baby....

wangi........

 

hai lah anak....

bila kah kamu mahu keluar?

 

 

 

 

3am

dah 3 malam berturut² I terjaga at exactly 3am

sumpah tak tipu

bile terjaga, tgk jam kt hp, 3am

 

bukan terjaga sbb mimpi

or sbb nk terkench

or sbb sakit

or sbb baby tendang

or sbb hujan ke ape

 

tp mmg automatically,

terjaga.tgk jam. 3.00am

weird kan?

 

adekah my biology clock sedang mengajar myself utk berjaga di tgh mlm

demi anak kami nnt?

 

lak tu, bile dh terjaga, bukan nye boleh lelap balik

maka i terus bangun

gi bilik air,

lepaskan hajat kecil yg mmg sentiasa je ade

dlm pd tu, terlintas di hati

nk solat hajat

terus angkat wuduk, lalu menyembah diri padaNya

begitulah rutin ku 3 malam yg lalu

 

hajat ku buat masa ini, hanyalah satu

dipermudahkan, diselamatkan dan diberkati tatkala melahirkan benih kami nnt

bersungguh² aku berdoa, sehingga tersedu²

 

dgn suasana mlm yg hening,

buat aku byk reflect balik segala dosa aku masa lalu

 

malu rasanya hendak meminta bermacam² dariNya

sedangkan aku sering lalai dgn perintahNya

bila dh susah, baru mahu mencari

Astaghfirullah

 

ampunkanlah dosa hambaMu yg hina ini, ya Allah