The birth of Ayyash Az-Zidane

Bismillah

Alhamdulillah..I am now a proud mother of two. A girl and a boy. Sepasang sudah…boleh berehat lama skit. Eiceh…ye je…sekali…tettttttt…baru pas bersalin ni pon mcm dh rindu masa pregnant. Bersalin kali ni lebih kurang je masa bersalin nurin. Cuma entah kenapa, kali ni takde rase serik sgt.

Utk kenangan, here’s the chrono

Dec 2013

Company keluarkan memo mengatakan Maternity Leave starting 2014 akan increase ke 90 days. Sgt2 berharap adik akan lahir on 2014, to be exact, Jan 3, 2014. Siap ajak ramai2 doakan by putting up the words in fb…hikhik…so as others read, at the same time they are praying for me lah kan. Sbb tu kena specific…

screen capture of my fb status

Jan 2, 2014 – Thursday

• Specifically request hubster utk bacakan Yaasin utk baby and I, semoga semua selamat and dapat lahir esok

Jan 3, 2014 – Friday
• Bgn pagi dgn perasaan berdebar, mcm dpt rase today IS the day

me on my last day of pregnancy

• 8am - Sampai ofis, terus ke toilet. Rasa mcm nk menjerit and nk sujud syukur kat situ jugak bile nmpak lendir darah on my pantyliner. Walk to my desk sambil tersengih2 sbb lama sgt dh tunggu saat ni. Call hubster, bitau condition and agreed utk jumpe kt umah.

• 9am – drive back home. Colleagues pelik sbb masih nk drive. Huhuh…baru keluar tanda…takde rasa sakit pon

• 9am to 4pm – smpai umah, last minute packing, mandi lama gile, siap syampu rambut and hisap air hujung rambut. Hubster beria mengasak ajak g hospital cepat. Masalahnye x sakit sgt. Stakat on and off cramps je.. Kompem sesia je g hospital. Lepas siap semua, pergi rumah mak. Konon nak drop brg2 pantang, then nk ajak hubster g jejalan dulu. Tup2, melekat kt umah mak. Mak siap masak kari ikan…sayang xde bendi…2 pinggan makan sbb tau perlukan tenaga nnt..solat zohor, ngaji sikit…try tdo xleh..excited sgt…

• 4pm – masih x rase skt sgt, tp sbb terlalu berharap nk lahir haritu jugak, so rasa mcm nk serah diri je. Mana tau, dgn Pitocin, sempat lahir aritu jugak…gerak dr umah, singgah umah babysitter nurin, nk pass extra baju n diapers. Peluk cium dia yg tgh tdo..sayu…singgah petronas, beli ice cream

sempat menikmati ice-cream top ten RM1.50..favourite nih.

• 4.30pm – singgah Shaklee tmn molek, beli supplements utk pantang. Zinc, Vit B, Vit C, Vitalea and Ostematrix.

• 5pm – sampai PAC HSI. Btau turun tanda. Yg ade hanyalah 2 houseman girls. a Chinese and a malay. The Chinese did VE on me, turns out baru 1-2 cm. dia suruh balik. I tanye, u tak buat CTG ke? And she replied, Perlu ke? I said, I demand for it. Turns out, CTG x cntik. Baby Sleeping pattern katenye. Berkali2 nurse betolkan kedudukan CTG tu. Kebetulan a MO lalu my bed, saw my CTG, and scream “who attend this patient??” berlari the Chinese girl to me. I masih igt the ayat the MO marah kan the HO.. “Didn’t u look at the CTG? I said ARM now! Now means now!!! In two minutes, if she’s not in the labour room, anything happens to her, u answer!” peghhhh..terkujat makcik sbb masa tu tgh berangan, kalau betul kene blk, dh plan nk ajak hubster singgah mcd, beli Prosperity burger. Punah lah harapan…kalau dh masuk labour room, mmg xdptlah nk mkn…masa kena tolak dgn wheelchair, I was so blur..ARM tu ape? Tanya attendant yg tolak tu, rupenya pecahkan ketuban…erk?! Mmg tak gentle langsung la birthing aku kali ni

• 6.15pm – the MO pecahkan ketuban. Tak sakit, tp sgt tak selasa sbb dia mcm rodok2 benda panjang tu. Yg I pulak terkemut, maka susahlah dia nk buat. Tetiba, gushhhhh…air panas mencurah…lega, x sakit….dia siap pesan, u rest kejap, around 7 start Pitocin which means contraction mmg akan kuat selepas tu. He did VE, 3 cm.

• 7.15pm – start Pitocin

in labour room. selepas air ketuban dipecahkan and on pitocin

• 8.15 pm – 4cm. contractions 2 in 10. Masih boleh handle. Masih boleh berbual dgn hubster.

• 9.30 pm - the CTG shows that my baby is distress tp I x rase pape pon. so i have to wear the oxygen tube. rimas gak bende tu. but for my baby's sake, redha...

• 10-12 pm – sakit yg maha sakit…no progress in my dilation. Mcm tak consistent dgn contraction yg maha hebat tu..sampai 100++ reading bile skt tu…by then, I already maxed out on Pitocin dosage. I asked them to call Dato’ Ghazali for advice. He advised to increase sikit lg and monitor. C-Sec should be under consideration by now. oh oh...I really hate the ethonox gas...i xnk, tp midwife tu sibuk suruh pakai to help ease the pain. masalahnye, it doesnt help at all. n dh tau bnd akan buat I ngantok. kang kalo ngantok, i bertambah cranky. tp hubster pujuk gak mintak ikut ckp midwife...i sedut gak, tp kekadang saje sedut tipu2, takut sgt ngantok...

in between contractions. sbg kenangan.

Jan 4, 2014 - Saturday

• 1.30 am – sakitnye Ya Allah…segala breathing technique I dah apply. Nothing helps anymore. Asked for VE, turns out, 5cm!!!! 1 cm je gerak in 5 freaking hours???!!! Another doc came in and mention, “Lets hope for a miracle”. Dengar je perkataan miracle, I teringat something. Kertas doa (selusuh) yg my dad buatkan for me. I was holding on to it since smpai hospital. Tp masa tgh dok sakit2 around 9pm, the kertas jatuh on the floor and hubster put it away in my bag. Terus I mintak kertas tu, and hold on to it.

• 1.50 am – hubster mintak izin nk turun minum sbb x mkn or minum pape sejak maghrib. I said NO! he said kejap je, sempat punye sbb I baru 5cm. but still, I x bg. kejam, tp motherly instinct ni.

• 1.56 am – rase mcm nk terberak sesangat. Mintak midwife buat VE. She refused, saying doc bru je buat 20 minutes ago. I siap merayu kt dia, please….I tak tahan sgt ni…I nk teran dah….seeing my face, dia buat jugak. And Alhamdulillah, maha kuasa Allah, I dah full dilate! 5 cm of progress in 30 minutes! Sama mcm kes nurin dulu, beria lah I kena kemut tahan, sbb nk tunggu midwife setup barang.

• 1.58 am – midwife request nk buat episiotomy?! Hello!!! I blom try push lg u dah nk potong??? I said No!!! dia kata saya kena buat, nnt baby susah nk keluar. I said No! I boleh!! Beria aku buat perineal massage oih! Unfortunately, I did not inform and educate hubster on this, maka he gave his consent. Next second, zappp, bunyi gunting. Sigh………lesson learnt here

• 1.59 am – dgn sekali push, keluar kepala. Next push, lahirlah anak kedua kami. Alhamdulillah. Hilang segala rasa sakit yg berejam tu. Mcm magic! Syukur jugak, kali ni, hubster dpt witness everything. I terus bukak butang baju, and they placed him on my chest. Tried to bf him, tp dia xnk sedut…jilat2 je…xpelah dik…at least dpt jugak skin to skin…

Ayyash Az-Zidane bin Mohd Afiq

2.75 kg, 50cm

Jan 4, 2014 1.59 am

SVD

terserlah kelonjongan kepala hasil teran sebelum masa

selepas first poo dibersihkan

our first 'decent' picture together.

Mungkin sbb both my kids are born petite, so mmg senang nk teran keluar. Infact, senang sgt. Itu bahagian I. seksa menahan contraction yg lama, tp dipermudah saat melahirkan.

Apepon, syukur sgt2...serik? mcm x je...hikhikhik.

Mama

Alhamdulillah, dah masuk 2014. dh 39 weeks pon kandunganku ini...melepasi gestational age kakak Nurin yg lahir 37w3d dulu...

Smlm g gcheckup, uncle li kate In shaa Allah, baby besar sikit dr kakak yg kecik je lahir dulu at 2.39kg... dh melepasi 2014, i really do hope baby akan lahir soon sbb cam dh malas nk g keje n x larat nk ngusung perut and susah nk tidur lately ni. to be precise, mmg harap sgt akan lahir esok, 3 Jan 2014. sebab esok jumaat, and esok 1 RabiulAwal n 3hb is birth date Nurin and I...

makin nk melahirkan, ingatan kat mama makin kuat. tiap kali jugak terigt ttg my post kt fb recently...

komen mama tu buat I nangis teresak2 bile first time baca...yes...she has always been there for me throughout the important events in my life...except during labour. *nangissss*

siapa yg tau, tau lah. my mom sakit yg tak sakit. she cant walk, but she is not in pain. xnk citer lebih2...ni pon cam dh sebak, sbb igt mama...lately ni pon, bile g umah diorg masa wiken, bile nk gerak blk, mesti rasa sayu bile salam mama..I sometimes secretly wish that 1 day, mama boleh berjalan semula. Amin.

11.12.13 ~ 3 years

Semalam 11.12.13, hari ulangtahun perkahwinan kami ke-3…Alhamdulillah

Masih baru, masih byk benda yg kena blaja, masih byk ruang perlu dibaiki…We learnt from each other everyday. Tipu la kalau xde selisih faham, gaduh2 manja…in fact, bile gaduh2 tu la u know more about your partner…and bile baru berbaik semula, tu yg best!tetibe memasing jadi extra romantic…pendek kata, if u ask me, gaduh2 manja tu perlu dalam perkahwinan. Kalau x, hidup ni mcm terlalu monotonous. Hikhik.

Alhamdulillah, semlm, genap jugak baby adik 36 weeks @ 9 bulan. 1 more week to term. 10 more days kalau dia lahir sama umur mcm kakak. Nervous. Tapi, last Tuesday, my company ade wat communication session dgn employees on the revised benefits for 2014. One of it was, maternity leave akan ditambah dari 60 hari, ke 90 hari effective 1 Jan 2014. Huwaghhhhhh… my EDD is Jan 8, 2014. Dalam hati dupdap dupdap…dpt ke tidak baby adik tunggu smpai at least 39 weeks eh? Marilah kite sama2 berdoa anak kami akan bertahan sehingga sekurang2nye 39 minggu. Amin.

Berbalik cerita anniversary, we both took a day off, hoping to spend some quality time with each other. In shaa Allah, lepas ni, every year, ini akan jadi routine kami. Masa first year, mmg kebetulan anniversary hari Ahad, so gi hi-tea buffet kt Paragon hotel je..Nurin pon baru 2 bln masa tu..so xde la nk merendek tak tentu pasal…ngulit anak lg best kot…huhuhuhu…thn lepas lak, on weekdays, Selasa tak silap…last minute I ade bende urgent kena settle kt ofis, so masuk keje pg tu, tghari, amik half day, amik Nurin, we went for buffet-lunch at KSL, and shopping spree…

Tapi tahun ni, I told my husband, lets spend some time just the two of us. Tinggalkan Nurin kt Babysitter… He doesn’t like the idea at first, but I don’t care. I want him for myself. Just for one day. Selfish? X sayang anak? Jgn la ckp mcm tu… We parents, do need some time alone, to bring back the sparks in our marriage. Sehari je, working hours lak tu…so mcm no difference pon pd Nurin.

Pagi tu hantar dia, she was chirpy and bubbly..Mama pon happy je. Tapi abah rasa sayu masa nk drive off from babysitter’s house sambil tgk Nurin dok melambai bye2 kt kitorg…hukhuk…dia jarang dpt moment tu sbb selalu, hari2 mmg I je yg hntr Nurin..so I biasa je…Abah je emo lebih. -__-

First, we went for my antenatal checkup kt KK Masai. Oh yes, last week, on Wednesday morning, my car kene langgar from the back at the traffic light. Kete belakang tu menggelongsor kot. I was driving, so baby bump terlanggar stereng. Maka MC dua hari sbb BP naik n badan sakit2…nothing serious…kete pon xde pape, takat huruf U kt plat blkg, patah sikit. So tu yg kene wat follow up after a week…KK kan…biasa la…amik masa skit…pung pang pung pang, kol 10 baru settle dari kol 8…ni first time jugak husband teman I checkup kt KK…selama ni I pergi sorg…

Settle checkup, we went to City Square…selama ni I dh berangan nk try buffet kt Renaissance on anniversary..siap dh call n buat reservation…tp bile pikir2 balik, nk tunggu buffet lunch, kol 12, masa tu baru kol 10, ape nk buat tunggu 2 jam kan? Nk balik, n kluar balik? Mmg tak.Tetibe husband mengutarakan keinginan dia yg dh lama nk mkn kt Seoul Garden. So ke City Square la..sbb boleh tgk movie skali…

Sampai, ard 11, buffet lunch start at 11.30…so jalan2 dulu, beli roti utk alas perut, sbb mmg tak mkn lgsg dr pg…beli tiket wayang, smbil jln, asik la dok crita pasal Nurin….haihhh…tu la kan…dh jd mak pak ni, our life asik kaitan anak je…sikit2 anak. Nk beli pape pon igt anak. Smpai tgk movie pon ade kaitan pasal anak. Kitorg tgk cite Homefront. Siapa yg dh tgk tu, tahu lah… 

Habis movie, ard 3 plus, jalan kejap, terus balik. Tu je la celebration kali ni…perut dh 9 months kan…nk jalan sgt pon x larat…nmpak simple, lunch and watch movie. Tp dh cukup utk kami, given my condition. Yg penting, moment tu. Sepanjang jln2 tu pon, husband dok pimpin tgn I…tak tahu lah sbb I ni jln lmbt sgt, or he’s just being romantic. Either way, I’m feeling loved.

Tapi tahun depan, In shaa Allah, ade rezeki and peluang, I dh usulkan nk pegi USS…Spore je…balik hari pon boleh kan…I loveeeee theme parks…nk sgt pergi…masa USS baru bukak, kiorg tgh prep nk kahwin…so xde bajet nk pegi…then I got pregnant. Lagi la x leh pegi…rugi je…selama ni tak terpikir nk pegi berdua je sbb x terpikir nk tinggalkn Nurin. We thot we could wait smpai dia besar skit, n dia dh boleh enjoy the rides, baru rase berbaloi…tp ni dh expecting a second one, I told my husband, wutdeheck…I nak jugak pergi. I cant wait till our second one dh besar baru nk pergi…lama lagi tu…mahu lagi 3 to 4 yrs…kang keluar lak yg ke-3, tangguh lagi? Hukhuk…kang I plak yg dh tua, tak dpt nk enjoy the rides. Huhuhu…

Reminder utk 2nd baby nanti

Kali ni MasyaAllah…pemalas gile nk mkn ubat or supplements…gi KK, dpt ubt, ngelat2 mkn..1 hari mkn, 3 hari x mkn..not good..mgkn sbb byk jenis..folic acid, Vit B, Iron, Vit C..so malas! Dh masuk 6 months, ttbe cam risau perkambangan baby, kot x cukup zat, so beli Obimin…ade yg kata Obimin x bagus, konon better amek Shaklee, tp Shaklee pon bermcm jugak, kompem x mkn jugak kang…Tp cm nk amik Shaklee masa pantang…tp masih x berapa yakin yg diri ini akan rajin menelan berbiji2 tu…hurmm…tp nk sihat, kuat n kurus. Acane?! Anyways, here I nk share few things to remind myself on what should/ shouldn’t utk second baby ni

• I should bitau midwives awal yg I plan to fully BF my baby. Nurin dulu, I x dpt the privilege, maybe sbb she was born kecik, 2.39kg. betul2 bwh skit kt borderline…utk newborn, 2.4 kg is considered as normal weight katenye. So bile lahir, I dpt pgang kejap, than she was taken away and I’ve been told she was given glukos ke ape, I x igt. Padahal rasenye boleh je terus BF kot. So this time, kena be more firm.

• Teruskan rutin memperdengar bacaan ayat2 Quran most of the time, especially masa dia tidur. Motifnye mostly utk biasakn baby utk boleh terus lena walau dlm keadaan ‘bising’. I ade baca dulu, biar baby tidur depan TV. But I rase, dr dia dengar yg bukan2 kt TV tu, baiklah dgr something yg bermanfaat…bermanfaat jugak utk mama, walau x dpt solat, dpt lah pahala dgr ayat Quran kan. N Alhamdulillah, Nurin skrg, ok je tidur walau org keliling berbual ke ape…tp kalau bunyi yg kuat ttbe tu, mmg terjaga jugaklah…mcm petir and such.

• Jangan mandikan baby yg baru lahir dgn sabun. Dulu x tau..beria mandikan bb dgn sabun pureen yogurt yg blueberry…mmg sedap bau…tp, rupenye tak elok eh? Not sure la sbb ni ke nurin ade eczema..sbb masa pregnantkn dia dulu, I suke sgt minum soya bean…ade jugak kata soya bean boleh wat bb prone having eczema…so kali ni, I mmg xmnum pon soya bean…tgk nnt camne, ade effect x..tp back tu kes sabun, I’ll try my best to convince mak jgn mandikan bb dgn sabun.

• Tentang pacifier. Nurin was given pacifier sekejap. Ini di luar kemahuan I. MIL yg beria pegi beli n tonyoh. I can still rmmbr how heartbroken I was when I first saw MIL came back with a pacifier. Dh la yg bukan orthodontic punye. Tp bile dh ade anak, n baca jugak pengalaman org, ade yg anaknye dok hisap jari smpai ke besar, utk kes cmni, daripada jari, mmg lebih baik dia hisap paci. So I cant really say Im against paci, tgk keadaan mcm mana…sbb nurin xde kes suka hisap jari yg overdose, mak bg paci sbb dia tgk nurin asik nk nyusu, which is perfectly fine to me, but not her. Tp bile dh nipple crack ke ape, I bersyukur jugak ade paci tu…huhuhu

• Tentang buai. Sama kes mcm paci, I dulu sgt x setuju bile mak beli buai…lagi2 bile masa nurin 4 bulan, terjadi kes buai jatuh. Bukan nurin jatuh buai. Tp tali yg menyangkut buai tu putus, maka nurin yg dlm buai, jatuh, n hanger yg sangkut kain buai tu mencalar bawah mata nurin. Betul2 bawah mata. Mmg berdarah…tapi, thou I may think that I don’t need the buai bile jaga nurin sbb she’s bf bb, I have to rmmbr that I’m working. Someone else yg akan jaga dia. N I have to be considerate. So Nurin mmg berbuai masa mak jaga up to 6 months, then disambung dgn BS smpai umur dia dlm 14 bln gitu…skrg, dia dh tak berbuai lg…Alhamdulillah, ok je…so I rase, it is ok utk ur bb tdo buai, tp jgn make it as a must. Kalau x, sile la angkut buai ke mana saja anda pergi.

• Never change ur bb’s bottle teats (if u plan to bf in long term). I rase this is one of the reason Nurin xde masalah direct feed or bottle feed. Smpai skrg I x penah lg upgrade teats dia… She’s still using TT bottle…eh…tp masa sethn lebih tu I ade jugak bg dia pakai MAM yg anti colic tu for few month…lelama, I yg rasa leceh sbb byk parts, n susu meleleh bile kite terbalikkan botol. Nurin mmg la suke nyepahkan susu…so tukar blk ke TT. Ni dia dh x bf, I wonder shud I change her teats? Ke x pyh?

• I love to swim. So kalau boleh I nk my kids pon layan je mama ajak swimming…Mcm Nurin dulu, dlm 4 months, I dh pelan2 ajar dia mandi air paip biasa…no heater or warm water…sbb mmg nk biasakan dia dgn air yg normal temp…Alhamdulillah, dia suke n easily adapt dgn water temp kt pool…

• On car seat…Nurin masih ok duduk dlm car seat kalau no other passenger. She knows that she has no choice. Tapi kalau abah yg drive, mmg mintak maaplah dia nk dok dlm car seat tu…we didn’t train her on that. Kekadang,bile nk keluar bertiga, I saja lengah2 masuk kete, so abah will secure her in her carseat, n dia pon ok je, then abah reverse the car, I pon tutup gate segala, once dia nmpak I masuk kete, maka meraung lah dia mintak klua dr carseat. Ceit.I shud’ve always harness her in her carseat, everytime we went out, sejak kecil lg. X kire berdua, atau beramai2, so that she’ll get used to it. But thinking back, mungkin dulu I rase leceh nk masuk n kluarkn dia dr carseat bile Im not driving, sbb I kn bf dia. So leceh ah bile nk bf…so this time ard, I shud try harder on car seat routine.

Mcm ade lagi…tp x igt dh…tp diingatkan, those are from my perspective…lain org lain caranye, and lain keberkesanannye… I pon bukan jenis yg obsess. Obsess bf ke, obsess amik/xamik vaksin ke etc..Neutral gitu…semua ponnk yg terbaik utk anak memsaing kn.. and if it fits u, doesn’t mean it fits others…x payah nk judgemental sgt..lek lek sudaaa…

Kali kedua

Bismillah

SubhanaAllah…lama gile x update sini. Kesian Baby adik, xde langsung citer pasal dia kat sini. Baby Adik? Ehem.Well, were expecting our second bundle of joy very soon. Arini genap 33 weeks (8m1w)…EDD ikutkan dlm 8 or 13 Jan…Tapi kalau ikutkan time Nurin dulu, she was born at 37w3d, so most probably I’ll be in labour by year end. Tapi jugak, dulu, masa Nurin, I mmg ‘berusaha’ utk lahirkan awal. Sbb my sis is getting married a week after my EDD masa tu. Alhamdulillah, ‘usaha’ kami tu berjaya…By the time majlis akak, I dah consider sihat, boleh jln elok tak terkepit2, siap boleh tolong serba sikit masa majlis, tp masih dlm pantang…baru 3 weeks + kot masa tu…

As for this second one, I tak kisah pon lahir bile..mmg kalau boleh nk next year…tp xnk lah smpai kena induce ke ape… Bismillahi tawakkal je lah…Positif thinking akan lahir normal..In shaa Allah… tp skrg yg baru 8 bulan ni pon rasa cam x sabar nk deliver, sbb perut rasa ketat sgt2…jln mmg terasa ke’penguin’an terserlah…especially bile dh lama duduk, then tetiba nk ke toilet. Fuhhhh….mana nk cepat, mana tak larat nk melangkah…terus ‘penguin’!

So far, this pregnancy, Alhamdulillah…ok ok je…lebih kurg mcm pregnantkn Nurin dulu. Muntah mmg ade, loya mmg ade, tp ok je…xde la melampau smpai kena masuk air ke ape…I anggap tu perubahan positif as I AM pregnant. I ade baca, loya nausea tu semua actually a good sign that ur baby is growing. Wallahualam. Positif suda….

Weight? Dulu naik smpai 20 kilo! Kalini, dh 8 bulan, baru naik dlm 8/9 kilo je…Alhamdulillah… huhuhu…nak kata xde selera, x jugak…mkn je…maybe x lemau or lembik mcm first pregnancy, walau berbadan dua, masih aktif. Terima kasih pada si intan payung Nurin Balqis. Hahaha… dh 8 bulan ni pon, I masih lagi dukung budak 13 kilo tu turun or naik tangga…not every day la…bile dia moody or amuk je…mostly, dia ok je naik bilik sendiri, smbil count 1,2,3!

Dr segi rupa badan, dh masuk 7 bulan baru ramai kt ofis tegur ‘eh…u pregnant eh?!’…mmg x nampak sgt rasanye perut ni…one thing, bdn mmg sedia besar walau x pregnant, harap maklum. Hahaha. Kali ni pon x beli baju pregnant langsung..Cuma beli maternity pants je…g keje masih boleh je pakai baju kurung, or pape baju2 yg agak2 lose…tp sehari dua ni tetiba rasa cam semua serba ketat lak…nk beli baju baru, cam alang2…tinggal dlm sebln je lg..hurmphh.

Masih drive to and fro work…Ok je…dulu pon drive je smpai nk bersalin. Not a big issue.

Alahan? Xde sgt jugak. Nothing obvious. Igt lagi, dulu x suke btol kari…skrg, boleh sengih lebar bile balik umah mak, mak masak kari.. heheheh..ngidam pon xde bende bukan2…ape2 yg teringin, Alhamdulillah, dpt je…teringin ni bukan nye ape, ni gara2 ternampak org upload gmba mknn kt fb or IG la ni…durian, ketam, cake, donut, sushi…so far dpt je semua tu…xde le mintak benda2 yg susah didapati.

Kakak Nurin? Nk masuk 2y2m. Makin keletah. Masih kurang bercakap dgn ayat/words yg betul. Kata org, kepetahan budak bercakap ni based on dgn siapa dia bergaul…kt umah babysitter, ade sorg kakak dlm 3 thn lebih…and dia ckp pon mcm pelat n x berapa petah..so maybe Nurin pon lebih kurang…but simple instructions, dia mmg paham. A-Z, dah kenal, tapi x reti nyanyi ikut sequence. Kekadang ikut sukati dia, bile tunjuk D, dia sebut dog, huruf I, sebut Ice cream…tunjuk monkey, sebut M…huhuhu…konsep ikut suke/ikut mood.. mmg I x berapa emphasize kt dia on the ABC song, I lebih byk expose dia pd video yg phonics. Tp utk numbers lak, I dah buat silap. Dia mcm igt numberstu mcm alphabets…dia blom dpt nk kaitkan numbers as counting. Yg dia tau, dia kenal all the numbers, and tau jari dia ade 10.

In terms of food, according to kak pidah (her BS), elok je makan ape yg disuap…maybe sbb kt umah BS ade geng, mkn dgn kawan…dgn weols, I kena pndai tackle interest dia…make sure jgn bg susu dlm 2 jam sblm mkn, pakai pinggan kita, bukan pinggan dia, n kalau xnk, sumbat je jugak dlm mulut dia, kasi dia rasa…kekadang dia nk, kekadang dia mmg amuk xnk…ikut nasib.

Lately ni, sejak last weekend, tetiba dia xnk ngan abah..mandi, salin pampers semua nk mama…abah cuit, terus ngamuk, marah2….adoiyai anak…mama makin sarat, tp ku turutkan jua…selagi berdaya, I’ll try my best to attend her needs and wants…bile dh xmampu, especially bab yg lately ni dia asik tdo lambat, mmg mama bolayan…mama tdo je dulu…pepandai lah abah layan…tp abah kata, abah pon kekadang tertido dulu…hahaha…ckp pasal tdo, dia jugak suke tido sambil meleseh/menyondol mama…beria mama beli katil n tilam king size last month, kena himpit jugak…abah kekadang give up, abah tido bawah (kt tilam single yg patutnye was meant for nurin) sbb nurin suka tendang…kepala dia nk dkt ngan mama, abah, dia bg kaki! Huahuahua…esok pagi, I itgk, kami berdua je tdo atas katil, n mama lg sikit nk jatuh, dek nurin yg dok menyondol mama ke tepi katil…tp mama suke je nurin mcm tu…rasa diperlukan…kekadang terdetik jugak rasa risau, takut she’s overly attached to me, nnt bile dh ade adik camne kn? Tp again, positif! Anggap je la dia nk kn perhatian I skrg…seolah dia tau nnt perhatian tu bakal berbelah bahagi…so selagi boleh, mama layan nurin!

Nurin skrg minum susu Sustagen Junior 1+ tasty Plain (lengkap description kau)…dh lama stop breastfeeding, sbb mmg dh takde susu pon sejak mengandung 5 bln…tp tgn dia, masih liar menjalar, mencari destinasi…n masih jugak nk hisap! Kekadang, bile dh amuk sgt, I bg jugak…tp selagi boleh, I’ll try to distract her…kekadang it works…yg tak tahan tu bile dia nk menggentel! Sakit oih! Tu yg seboleh2, I xnk bg dah… ni dh 4 hari dia tak hisap langsung. Harap2 akan mmg x mintak lagi….bile dipikir balik, mungkin sbb ni jugak dia skrg tdo lmbt…dulu, I x larat nk layan, I bg je dia, kasi dia khayal, n senang tdo…skrg ni mmg xnk bg, tu yg lmbt dia tdo kot. Kot la!

Eh…panjangnye update kali ni..hikhik…sbnanye nk share psl persiapan baby…tp ni dh termerapik ke hal lain…so len kali je lah…hukhuk

Wasalam.

Throwback

• Atok passed away on 3rd day of Raya Aidilfitri. Sedih, tapi bersyukur sbb dpt jumpe dia, n semua anak/menantu/cucu n cicit dpt jumpe dia b4 dia pegi....dia pon nmpak happy walaupon 'beraya' kt hospital. sbb tu raya yg lepas, mcm tak raya bg kami
• Nurin started to walk 3 days before she hits 16 months. a lil late, but definitely a positive progress. Frankly I started to worried, but everyone ard me tells me to chill. Alhamdulillah. 
• Went for family outing with my parents, sis n BIL n girl. first nite spent in melaka. went to klebang coconut milkshake, umbai for seafood, jonker street for a walk. next day off to Pullman Putrajaya. nice resort, but its too big that ppl could get lost in it. will write a proper review on this if time permits
• Ya Allah. sgt suke tony roma's...sedap gils please...kenapala JB ni takde TR. tp bagus gak takde. pokai aku kang
• masih breastfeed Nurin Balqis, tapi dh supplement dgn Formula Milk (Sustagen) since 1y6m. tried fresh milk. tapi dia mcm allergic...abes sekeliling mulut merah2...takpelah...semua mak nak yg terbaik utk anak dia. tp tak semua yg kite plan akan menjadi. so go with the flow je la....tak payah bashing2 bagai...rezeki masing2...
• Nurin masih belum clearly cakap...'Mama' pon jarang...yg betol clear is Ateng (atok) and abah
• thinking of getting her to join playgroup. nk kasi dia socialise and build up her confidence to speak up. tp alahai...kt JB ni mana je la yg ade.
• Nurin dh makan adult food....curry, tomyam, masak kicap, nasi lemak...but of coz tak pedas punye version. pun dh pandai demand nk makan sendiri...pakai sudu lak tu!
• started to learn to scribble...smlm g kedai 2 ringgit, beli colourin book and pencil color...she loves it. asik nk mengaler je keje skrg. bagus la...dpt kurgkn iPad session.
• she loves books too...suke bile kite bacakan with different intonations...i suke bile i tgh baring, dia jln terkedek2 to me, n hulur a book. suruh dia bam2 sblh, n we read together. tang baca buku ni, biasanye dia yg initiate the session. i taknak paksa. so far so good. mmg setiap hari mesti baca.
• tetiba pandai mengangguk2 bile dgr lagu...konon mcm feel the beat... mana la dia blaja tu
• pandai jugak konon baca doa...smbil sengih2. 
• kalau tgh nangis, n amuk, n tetibe cam tertendang something smpai bende tu jatuh, dia akan pause nangis and buat muke terkejut sambil say "oo oowww" smbil jari telunjuk goyang. comel...tp pastu resume sesi amukan...hahaha

campur aduk update. tak kisah lah...sbnanye hp tertinggal kt umah...ni kt umah mama...so boring, terbukak blogger, rase cam nk update. ni lah hasil. k thanks bai.

Planning for No. 2

Bismillah


My bestfriend came late last month. Almost 2 weeks late that I started to question myself, am I pregnant? I bought 3 home UPT kits without having any expectations in mind. Unlike when we’re expecting Nurin, I was all hyped and anticipated for the 2 lines (I wasn’t even late that time). Apart of me do wish for the 2 lines, but on the other hand, I kept on chanting ‘are we ready’? I’m nervous.

If you were to ask us whether we are ready, the answer would be Yes, followed by a long list of buts and hesitancies. To be frank, I’ve not get over of the agony of contraction pain, the torturing episiotomy, the sleepless nights, the painful cuts and bruises over breastfeeding, the mind-numbing post-partum depression, so on and so forth. But if I were to wait till I completely get over it, I don’t think that moment will ever come any soon, and I’m not getting any younger. All that has happened. And it happens for a reason. A reason to smile when you witness and experience the wonderful days as your child grows and learns.

Nope. We’re not expecting yet. But we’re officially off any family planning or protection that we’ve been lugging on for the past year. Nope, I wasn’t on any sort of pills coz I don’t trust myself to gobble down pills every single day diligently. Plus I heard that some pills may mess around with your hormones and cause you to put on more weight (which I don’t need because I’ve had my fair share) and plus, when you’re ready to conceive, you’ll need to plan 6 months or so ahead and bla bla bla… So we trust each other, and we turn to…condoms. It may not be the safest way on family planning, but it works for us so far (aside of fully breastfeed). At the end of the day, kun faya kun. It’s all in His hands. So we plan (not so diligently) and the rest, we leave it to Him to decide.

It was hard for us to decide whether we are ready for additional member to our little family. You see, me and hubs are both second child in our family. We both have sisters. And Nurin is the first and one and only (as for now) grandchild for both sides. You get the drill. I wouldn’t want to hurt anyone (if we ever get pregnant again). But as mama said, “Rezeki masing2”..This, is the main reason why I was reluctant to feel ‘happy’ to TTC. Deep down inside, how I wish 3 of us could ‘balloon up’ together. But yeah, who are we to decide.

The more we think about it, the more we thought, SubhanAllah! Allah knows better. He shall know when we are ready. So, goodbye planning, TTC, welcome aboard!