Thursday, April 30, 2009

tak pernah cukup

how enough is ENOUGH?

one thing for sure,
smlm hanye smpat lelap dlm 1 jam

and hari ni,
mata adelah sgt berat
otak adelah melayang2
badan adelah sgt lesu
lesu????darn!


p/s: i looked like a zombie walking around the hospital. its amazing that my brain can still work fine. I'm amazed by my capability.

Friday, April 24, 2009

Saaaaayang Ayah


Happy Birthday



I love you so very much

Wednesday, April 22, 2009

weak

arini puasa
arini masuk keje petang
ntah kenape, rase nk puasa arini

baru kol 4 ptg, dh rase letih semacam
pg tadi ade sahur sandwich ngan soya bean
tapi nape lembik sgt ni

bile dh lembik,
kpale pon mule la nk berdenyut
langsung tak kesian kt tuan dia nih
cek pressure, low
patut lah

haishhh
tak kan laaa tak bole puasa????
dh la ade 4 ari lagi nih
lagi bape bulan, dh ramadhan

haishhhh

Monday, April 13, 2009

Nasib baik mama tak pengsan

the other night (11 Apr 2009),
was a very special night for us
especially for mama

kt masjid ade majlis sambutan maulidurasul
since last week lagi weols mmg dh plan nk g
sebab kt sane, ade surprise utk mama

ayah yg dpt tau
n mama supposed to know as well
tapi ayah decide to keep it as our little secret
just to make it more memorable utk mama

so 4 of us, berjaya menyimpan rahsia tu
n the best part, ayah berjaya menghalang kawan2 mama dr bitau dia
kalau tak, abeslah rancangan kami
dh la mase tu kawan2 dia berduyun dtg umah semata2 nk smpaikan berita tu
tapi ayah sempat 'sound' diorang
nasib mereka paham

so mlm semalam,
masuk je maghrib, kami semua siap
ye, semua
mama pon cam ala2 pelik sbb weols cam smangat nk gi masjid
oh, itu sangat jarang berlaku yea

apepon, by 8, i make sure all of us are ready to go
sbb ayah dh pesan soh dtg b4 isya'
sbb nk 'parking' mama cantik2

malas nk cite pnjg2
majlis pon bermula
oh. ramai yg terperanjat tgk mama dtg
ditemani 3 dayang yang berhias cantik (read: kami) ;P

majlis pon start
bace doa, nasyid, bacaan ayat suci Quran
and the time comes
oh jantung saye adelah berdebar2

tokoh lelaki is jiran umah belakang a.k.a mama's bestfriend (cik norsiah)'s husband
mase pakcik mail amek award, mama dok ngendeng2 kt cik enon yg dok sbelah dia
"sape tokoh pompuan eh??", "mak ani ke?", "kak enon tau sape?"

and then....
"tokoh wanita pula merupakan seorang wanita pertama yang memegang jawatan ketua Hal Ehwal Wanita Anggerik (HEWA) " - mama dh terdiam


"beliau banyak menyumbangkan jasa kepada kelab tetapi tidak dpt meneruskan tugas di atas sebab kesihatan" - muka mama merah gile apetah lagi bile nampak ayah walks towards us
masa tu baru dia sedar, dialah tokoh wanita tahun ni

masa tu, i rasa sebak sgt
especially when hearing the second sentence
sgt menusuk kalbu
because i know how much she wanted to continue being active to make difference to others

tp takdir menentukan segalanya
kudratnye ditarik perlahan2
siapalah kita untuk menghalang kuasaNya
tapi mama redha
sekurang2nye lebih byk masa dpt dihabiskan mengabdikan diri kepadaNya

as ayah push her wheelchair towards the 'stage'
i can see her tears rolled down her cheeks
and i am sure its the 'happy' tears
same mcm tears mase i amek scroll dulu


my hand was trembling mase nk snap picture dia amek 'award' tu
menggigil toksah nk ckp
terlalu terharu
tp dpt la gak capture
cam nyesal gak sebab tak snap bebtol



once she got the 'award'
and pushed back to her space
kawan2 dia mula kerumun dia
saya adelah sgt mellow
lagi skali, menitis air mata sbb terlalu terharu
betapa lah jasa mama dikenang mereka



dah setel, dia cam terdiam
suddenly "nasib baik mama dh mkn ubat. kalau tak, mau pengsan."
rupanya dia adelah sgt terkejut
terkejut smpai darah naik
dia kan ade high blood pressure
adoiyai.

majlis diteruskan ngan ceramah dr ustaz Morsid
ceramah dia mmg best
first time i tak rase boring bile dgr ceramah
tapiiiiiiii...beliau adelah sgt garang
bygkan, dia bole pause ceramah sbb ade budak 2 thn dok lari2 dpan dia
dia adelah sgt marah!
garang betol!

balik tu,
kami masih bercerita ttg surprise tu
mama masih tak percaya weols sembunyikan hal ni dr dia
she did saw/realise the hints
tapi tak dpt tangkap
here are some of the hints:
  1. Sebelom ayah bertolak ke masjid, ayah pesan "You pakai cantik2 tau"
  2. Kakak beria makeup/touchup kan mama
  3. Kami beria nk gi cepat2
  4. Kami beria suruh mama turun dari keta bila smpai masjid. Ikutkan dia, dia nk dgr ceramah dr dlm kete je.
  5. Makcik mariam bisik kt mama "jasamu dikenang" mase salam2 peluk cium mama
and hint yang paling jelas, terang lagi bersuluh,

6. Kakak nak ikut pergi masjid utk attend majlis

ayah siap ckp "kalau tak, u ingat bebudak ni nk pegi ke maulud tu???"
mama's reply was "mane la tau dia dah dpt hidayah...."

erk.erm.huh?
kami terdiam.

anyway,
it may not be as huge as the grammys,
not as popular as the ABP
not as hip as AJL
or whatsoever it is

mama, we're proud of u



p/s: and this is why i tak dapat attend my bestfriend (sharan)'s engagement. Oh I am so happy for you babe!


Yours sincerely,

Thursday, April 9, 2009

sick

I'm sick
He's sick

and my job is taking its toll

*sigh*

Friday, April 3, 2009

kene tembak

first time since dah dkat 2 months i took charge,
i dah kene tembak
kenape???
sebab there are typo errors on the website

they went ballistic!
macam laaa aku letak muke aku yg comel kt website company
tetibe je nak tembak aku macam buat salah yang besar
its not my mistake, its my assistant's
tapi of cos, i have to be responsible
i am willing to do so

tapi yang ko hangin cam ribut taufan melanda kempas ni kenape????
sampai director kt spore pon bole call aku tu kenape?

aku bengang!

aku????

whatever.

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